To Have Another Baby…

or to not have another baby… this is the question. The problem is that there is no “right” answer. My husband and I agreed that we wanted to be done having kids by the time we were 40. We also agreed that we wanted to have four children. The pros and cons for the argument seem to be evenly weighted on both sides… and my opinion is smack in the middle of it. With potty training proving to be kind of a nightmare… One day my hubby said, “And you wanna go through this whole diaper thing again?” But a few days after that he said, “Well, I’m thinking another girl because potty training would be easier.” So there we were, weighing our decision for procreating on the potty training experiences we’ve had with our two children… It makes me laugh (and kinda makes me want to cry)!

I’m definitely a planner, so not having a plan or a goal or any guidelines has been really frustrating. And then the true underlying fear of having another one… losing another one. Do we have what it takes to go through it again if it happens again. Can our marriage handle it? Can our children handle it? Will I be too stressed to have a healthy pregnancy? Will I die in delivery? ORRRRR… Would this last one, just maybe, be the best experience ever? Would we have twins? My mom was 47 when she delivered her last child. My OB and fertility doctors have both told us we have plenty of time to have more children. The questions are overwhelming and the decision is daunting because of the time frame in which it needs to be made. My heart is kinda all over the place with it.