A New Friend

The Lead-Up to a New Friend

I had no idea what to expect… to be honest, I barely remembered what the mom looked like! Tall and blonde was what I remembered. We had one conversation at my sister-in-law’s house amidst a group of people. The next thing I know, we’re exchanging phone numbers for a playdate! We scheduled a date within 24 hours as I was thinking, “This chic is aggressive with this playdate stuff.” After rescheduling the playdate four times, for legitimate reasons, the time had come to face my fears. The time had come to make a new friend. I should proabably point out that I had never been on a playdate!

The Mini Freak Out

I’m not great with making new friends. I tend to dive in too deep and be too real. Just to watch friends walk away after a few years… leaving a huge hole in my life. All the while, thinking I had a new bestie for life. “My friends typically have a two year shelf life,” I’ll joke to the prospective friend. But, it has happened time and again.

I have a few friends that have stuck it out with me through the long haul. I called a bestie to get a big pep talk in preparation. “You’re not obligated to have playdates just because you have kids. More importantly, you don’t have to get super close to her if you don’t want to,” she told me. “Let her lead the conversation… and if it lulls, talk about your new hair regimen or something like that!” When I got off the phone with her, I texted my sister-in-law, because she has known this mom for years. Our playdate turned into dinner and she told me not to bring anything. Did that really mean to not bring anything? (see how badly I overthink things?!) I had to ask… and then settled on bringing a bottle of wine. I don’t like going anywhere empty-handed, my momma taught me that!

The Push to a New Friend

The nerves were running high as I pulled into the foreign driveway. She greeted me and my daughter (who was beyond excited) at the door, all smiles and spunk, and her house smelled delicious! Then she pointed to a stool, popped open two bottles of wine and we started chatting. She said she married and divorced twice (same here)… I found out that she had lost two babies to miscarriage (same here) and lost her sweet son at only a few months old. We talked about God, heaven, church, family, and relationships. After that, we sat on the couch sipping wine while chatting about online dating, messy houses and messy relationships. We laughed until we almost cried! Needless to say, we bonded!

The New Friend

I was surprised to look at the clock and actually feel bummed that I had to leave. We said our goodbyes and she said, “Ok! Can we come to your house next?!” Withouth thinking I responded with an emphatic YES! As my daughter and I pulled out of the driveway, I was proud of myself for putting myself out there. I am happy I took the risk and was vulnerable with someone new. I think God knows I need to be pulled out of my shell and nudged out of my nest every now and then. And He found the perfect person to do it! And, to my surprise, I’m looking forward to the next time we hang out!